Kick-Ass Bachelor Holiday Stove Top Dressing

This recipe is for bachelors who either haven't gotten any Holiday dinner invitations, or simply need a dressing fix between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Ingredients:

1 box, Kraft™ Stove Top Stuffing Mix for Turkey
1½ cups low sodium chicken broth
4 tablespoons salted butter (BUTTER, not spread or margarine)
½ teaspoon onion salt
ground black pepper
½ cup chopped pecans
½ cup chopped dates
1 jigger Jim Beam bourbon (white label, save the black label for sipping)
vegetable oil

Follow package directions for microwave preparation EXCEPT use broth instead of water, and butter instead of spread or maragine. Add onion salt and liberal dose of black pepper. While stuffing heats up in microwave, lightly toast chopped pecans in dry iron skillet over medium heat. Remove stuffing from microwave, fluff with fork, stir in pecans, dates and bourbon. Increase heat under iron skillet to medium high, add some vegetable oil, swirling pan to distrubute. Add stuffing to skillet, and let it brown. Flip and brown other side.

Gravy optional, but oh so good. (One can turkey gravy, butter, black pepper. Empty gravy into a pot over medium heat, wisk in some butter, add black pepper to taste.)

Official Press Release from Domino's Pizza....

Domino's Pizza Shines National Spotlight on Bellflower Resident Jon McKenzie


Domino's Pizza boxes across the U.S. to feature local "pizza proverb"

BELLFLOWER, Calif., May 2011 - Domino's Pizza, the recognized world leader in pizza delivery, is giving Bellflower resident Jon McKenzie more than 15 minutes of fame. Beginning in May, Domino's will deliver pizzas across America inside boxes featuring eight winning customer-submitted "pizza proverbs" - and one of which includes the artistic submission of McKenzie himself.

Domino's chose McKenzie's clever contribution out of more than 7,000 customer entries at PizzaProverbs.com, based on it's originality and creativity. Nearly 5,000 Domino's stores across America will deliver pizza boxes immortalizing McKenzie's full name, hometown of Bellflower, and his pizza-inspired proverb, "No Good Pizza Goes Unfinished."

"My first reaction when I won was 'Wow!'" said McKenzie. "I was thrilled! I've told all of my friends and family about my big win. I can't wait for the box to arrive so I can show it to people, take a picture with it, and post it on my Facebook page."

"We're thrilled to see our great city represented on Domino's boxes here and across the country, and are proud that someone as creative as McKenzie hails from Bellflower," said Mahmood Saalabi, Bellflower Domino's Pizza franchisee. "It's exciting that out of all the Domino's customers in America, one of our own rose to the top in this competition."

McKenzie will receive a personalized box with his pizza proverb, a $50 Domino's Pizza gift card, and a letter of congratulations from Russell Weiner, Domino's Pizza cheif marketing officer.

The copy on the box:

"When you're the last slice of a Domino's Inspired Pizza, danger lurks around every corner. With our hand-tossed dough, robust sauce, and bubbly mozzarella, you're destined to disappear quickly, leaving nothing behind but a satisfied smile. So says proverb winner Jon McKenzie. We thank Jon, and the nearly 8,000 other fans who contrubted their sage words, and invite you to ponder their wisdom at PizzaProverbs.com. Did we just create a proverbial masterpiece together? Oh Yes We Did."

Recipe: TWICE NUKED NOODLES FOR ONE

ingredients

½ cup low sodium chicken broth
wide, dry egg noodles
2 tsp butter or margarine
¼ tsp ground black pepper

tools

a 700 watt microwave oven

one microwavable, 3 cup capacity, Ziploc (or equivalent) brand plastic tub

method

Pour broth into plastic tub. Add the noodles by handfuls just until there is a layer of dry noodles resting on top of the submerged ones. Spoon the butter on top, and sprinkle with the pepper. Rest the tub's lid just on top, do not snap down closed. Set inside the microwave oven, set the oven's power to 50%, and cook for 10 minutes.

Remove tub, set lid aside and stir the noodles, getting the dryer noodles down into the broth. Leave lid off tub, set back inside the microwave and cook 5 minutes at 100% power. What liquid that has not been absorbed by the noodles will have mostly evaporated, leaving a more concentrated salt and chicken flavor.

Stir again and eat.

You can also make this with the same amount of salted water with a sprinkle of garlic powder in it.